Journal

How To Incorporate Non-Sexual Physical Contact Into Your Routine

While maintaining that physical connection with throughout-the-day butt smacks and soft caresses can leave you more open to sex, it can also combat another issue cancer survivors struggle with: poor body image.

You may feel that your body has turned traitor. And, depending upon the type of cancer treatment you opted for, you may be walking around with surgical scars, a stoma, or even missing body parts. This could make you feel self-conscious... perhaps even ugly. And when you feel that way, you definitely don't feel sexual.

The truth is, your body can be an incredible agent of change, and what it sacrifices to keep you alive and thriving is simply amazing! This is something that perhaps you need to be reminded of. So partners: Listen up. You may be hesitant to make a move on your love muffin, unsure of whether or not they're ready for intimate contact. But while you're respectfully keeping your distance, they're assuming that you no longer find them attractive. Shower them with hugs and kisses and an unexpected grope or two.

Those struggling with cancer: Your partner is at a bit of a loss right now. Provide them with the reassurance they need by initiating sultry smooches, or some extreme cuddling sessions. Some other ways to engage in some non-sexual touching include eye gazing and passionate hugging. Intense eye contact leads to greater intimacy, and something as simple as hugging can also help with your connection. Even a 30-second hug can raise oxytocin levels in women, and increase feelings of attraction.

So face each other, look deep into each other's eyes, and allow yourselves to melt into a close embrace. Then, instead of pulling away, keep hugging. Lean into each other. Relax into your partner's arms, erasing the space between your two bodies. Hold longer than is comfortable. And then even longer. And then, only after you've felt the tension melt out of your bodies, let go.

One of the biggest complaints we've heard from women is that their partners don't touch them enough, unless they want something physical in return. So often, we find ourselves going through the motions of being in a relationship, and forget the importance of simple gestures like a hug or an affectionate touch. Certain types of touch, including massage, can help take couples from feeling loved to actually wanting to make love without feeling forced.

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